Four Bondings and A Funeral
by naturegirlrocks
Summary: This is a copy of the movie Four Weddings and a Funeral, rewritten into a Harry/Draco fic. Draco returns to the wizarding world after five years in house arrest...


**Title**: Four Bondings And A Funeral

**Author**: naturegirlrocks

**Parings**: Harry/Draco, Remus/Sirius and some more…

**Rating**: G

**Words**: ~12 000

**Summary:** I have rewritten the movie "Four Weddings and a Funeral" to a Harry/Draco. No, I was not too lazy to come up with my own plot! (just a little)

**Warnings:** no graphic sex, only implied (sorry), Character Death

**A/N:** Is it just me or does Hugh Grant look like an adult Harry? – Anyway that was my inspiration.

**Discalamer**: The movie Four Weddings and a Funeral is the property of MGM, Harry Potter is the property of JKR. I only play with the pretty toys.

The alarm bell rang. Harry Potter sat straight up in bed, pulled his wand from under his pillow and pointed it at the thing that was so rudely disturbing his sleep.

"_Crucio_!"

The alarm exploded in several small pieces over the bedside table and floor. Harry fell back in the bed and was asleep again before he hit the pillow, not really caring that he just thrown an Unforgivable at his clock. He had done worse things.

***

Percy Weasley got up the second his alarm chirmed. He efficiently took his bathrobe and walked to the bathroom, knocking hard on his sister's door as he passed. He showered and brushed his red hair to part in the middle. As he walked back to his room he knocked on Ginny's door again.

"I'm up, for fucks sake!" he heard her call.

"Good morning to you too!"

Percy continued to his room and the clothes he had laid up the night before.

***

Sirius Black was supervising Kreacher frying eggs and bacon. The elf had glared at him several times, but Sirius had not backed away. Remus Lupin stepped in to the kitchen, freshly showered and shaved. Kreacher exhaled as he knew his master would stop hovering over him now. Sirius whimpered at his lover showing him the untied cravat around his neck.

"Why have you not learned to tie these yet?" asked Remus taking the ends of the necktie.

"There was not much need for formal wear in Azkaban," said Sirius kissing away a forgotten drop of shaving cream from Remus cheek.

***

Luna turned in her bed; she was not woken by the alarm clock exploding in the next room. She did not believe in clocks anyway.

***

Ginny Weasley was trying on dresses. She did not like any of them. With flicks of her wand she changed over and over again. Finally she settled on a long black dress that complimented her slim figure. With a sigh she left her room.

In the small kitchen Percy had already made an espresso for her. She took the little cup without a word and gulped down its contents. As she put the cup down, Percy threw a dish-spell on it. Ginny snorted and left the kitchen. Charing the small flat with her overly pedantic brother was beginning to tare on her.

***

George and Fred Weasley apparated from Diagon Alley to Grimmould Place. They could have gone directly to the Burrow but choose to travel with their friends. They had bags of tricks and jokes with them and did not want their mother to confiscate these.

Sirius and Remus came out to great them. All of them were wearing their best dress robes. The few muggles that rose early stared at them.

***

Harry slept on.

***

Percy proudly drove his Muggle car though the morning streets of London. He had just gotten the Muggle driving card and loved to show of his driving skills. Of course, he had made his own magical improvements on the car, together with his father. Ginny was not that impressed and stretched out on the magically enlarged front seat.

"You are late!" called Remus as Percy drove up in front of Grimmould Place number 12.

Percy just gave him a happy wave. He shook hands with Fred through the side window. Sirius made an air kiss to Ginny as a greeting. She caught it with a smile.

They all loaded up the trunk with their bags and got in the car. It fitted all seven of them very nicely. Sirius stretched out on his seat.

***

Harry woke up slowly, casting a time spell. It was half passed nine. He smacked his lips sleepily trying to think of what he was supposed to remember. Something suddenly came to his mind.

"Fuck" he screamed, rushing out of bed.

Grabbing his underwear and pulling them on, he rushed to the neighbouring room. He shook Luna awake. She was wearing her screamingly yellow pyjamas and was grunting something.

"Don't wanna hunt Skewts today, daddy…"

Harry shook her again and she opened her eyes. The pure panic in Harry's face seamed to make her more awake and remembering.

"Fuck" she said.

Harry ran back into his room grabbing his dress robes. He panicked even more when he could not find his good pants. Rumbling around his room, he could hear Luna doing the same in hers. Finally finding his pants he had trouble with the fly.

"Fuck, fuck, fuck!" he swore.

His broom was standing in the umbrella hold. Stroking it, he discovered that it was low on its enchantments and would not fly. Harry swore again. Luna was trying to fit her hair into a strange feathery hairdo, while she pulled on the orange-coloured dress. She was followed by a swarm of enchanted hairclips that flew to her hair, fitting the blond locks to her scalp.

"We have to take yours," Harry said shaking his lifeless broom.

"It is only a HawkSweeper," Luna looked nervously at her own broom in the umbrella stand. "It was never was made to take two…"

***

Harry pushed the poor broom to the limit. Luna was hanging on to his back trying to read the map. He had never flown unaccompanied by Weasleys to the Burrow before and was a little hesitant of the route.

"Witch way?"

"That way!"

"That way we just passed?"

"Yes!"

"Fuck," he made a death defying turn. "Hold on!"

"Fuck!" screamed Luna holding on for dear life.

***

Behind the house, hiding from the guests, stood Hermione Granger and corrected her big white dress that her mother had picked out for her. Seamus Finnegan helped her to fluff the many layers of taffeta, not really knowing what he was doing. Both having grown up with Muggles were not used to the idea of the bride having a best man instead of a bridesmaid. At first Seamus had refused, but had been promised by his wizard friends that it was really sexy.

***

"Bugger," said Harry as he landed himself and Luna on the Burrow back yard, very ungracefully.

Hermione and Seamus starred wordlessly at them. Harry tried to correct his clothing, swearing at the stupid broom that got caught in his dress robes.

"I love your dress," said Luna to Hermione tugging on her own orange gown down over her pink underwear. "Is it new?"

Harry gave his friends an apologising smile and grabbed hold of Luna's hand. He dragged her with him to the front garden. All other guests were there. Trying to calm himself down he dropped Luna off by Ginny and the others.

"You're great at being late," Ginny mused.

"Thanks," breathed Harry "I practice a lot."

He waved at Sirius and Remus and hurried up to Ron Weasley at the front of the altar.

"I'm sorry!" Harry held up his hands. "I will kill my self right after the ceremony."

"Not to worry," Ron looked relieved. "Percy was ready to fill your place."

"Thanks Perce," Harry gave the older Weasley a pat on the shoulder. "Like your hair."

Percy made a thumbs up and made his way back to the others.

"As long as you not forgot the rings," laughed Ron.

"No," grinned Harry in absolute panic; he had done just this.

His panic paused as he looked around and saw Draco Malfoy stepping in though the gates, seeming embarrassed by his tardiness. Harry's heart jumped a beat. Draco was wearing a fine cut white robe and a black pointy wizard hat.

"I hate people being late," Harry whispered to the nervous Ron, who lightened up at the joke.

***

Music started playing from the enchanted flowers. Slowly Hermione was led forward through the gathered guests, her hand lightly on Seamus arm. Mrs. Weasley and Mr Granger began to cry, both were comforted by their spouses.

"How lovely…" Luna was misty eyed as well.

"Your blind," snorted Ginny. "That muggle dress makes her look like a Custard Creampuff."

***

Hermione was delivered to Ron who took her hand and smiled. The Warlock of Peace began his speech.

"Dear friends we are here to witness the bonding…"

Harry looked over at Draco. It hade been five years since the blond had been sentenced to house arrest. The years had not changed his good looks. He was as handsome as ever, maybe even more. But unfortunately, for now, Harry had other things on his mind. The rings, the fucking rings. He caught Sirius eye, pleading for help.

"_Rings_," he mouthed

Sirius snorted, whispered something to Remus, who snorted too. Harry rolled his eyes and pressed his lips together. The request spread to George, Ginny and Luna, all looking down at their hands. Luna nodded and handed something to Sirius. The Warlock was getting to the end of his speech, Harry leaned forward to Ron.

"Back in a second," he whispered, stepping back to meet Sirius behind a big flower ornament.

Sirius handed him the rings.

"We tried to transform them," said Sirius with a smirk. "But you are never better than your material."

Harry stared at them, there was no choice. He hurried back to Ron's side.

"The rings?" asked the Warlock.

Harry handed them over with a shutter. A little hesitantly Ron placed the golden mood-ring on Hermione's finger. Hermione, in her turn, tread a golden _Quibbler_ code-ring on his. Harry tilted his head with a smile.

***

"Nice hat, Malfoy!" Harry tried not to sound condescending but failed.

"Thanks, Potter," said Draco with a handsome smirk walking passed him, not stopping. "I bought it especially."

***

"Wonderful bonding," said Percy to George. "What did you think?"

"Wonderful bonding," answered George in a mocking voice. "What did you think?"

"_Oh, it was a wonderful bonding_," signed Fred. "_What did you think?_"

"Prats…"

***

"Miss Lovegood!" Severus Snape drawled, nursing his second glass of champagne. "What an interesting dress… Pumpkin orange, is it?"

"Is there any other colour to wear at a wedding?" Luna smiled up at him. "It is the mating colour of the Nagging Birch Eater, you know."

"Off course," Snape rolled his eyes and looked around for more drinks. "I knew that!"

***

"So…" said Harry to Ginny. "Draco's back."

"He has three months left on his sentence," Ginny worked at the Ministry and looked unbothered. "He only got the day off because Mione invited him."

"He looks nice."

"He looks like a slut," she gave Draco a glare.

"Interesting."

"Out of your league."

"Clearly…" Harry swallowed his drink.

***

"Lets eat!" said Remus.

"Did any one else step in gnome shit?" asked Percy and pulled his wand. "Wouldn't want to ruin my chances getting lucky smelling like shit."

"Do you think I'd hate him so much if he was not my brother?" asked Ginny.

Remus laughed.

***

Harry hovered to get to Draco, but every time he got close someone spirited the man away.

"Wankers…" murmured Harry and went to the bar.

He picked up two glasses of champagne and tried again. Draco was free.

"Do you want one?" Harry offered a glass.

"Thanks" Draco took it.

"I…"

"Hello Harry!" he was interrupted by a flash of light from a camera.

"Colin," said Harry blinking, being forced to conversation. "How's that pretty girlfriend of yours?"

"She's not my girlfriend anymore…"

"Well, you are better of," Harry drained his drink. "She never stopped shagging that Hedersson bloke…"

"She's my wife…"

"Ah… Well…"

Draco excused himself with a contained laugh.

"Any kids?" harrumphed Harry feeling nauseated.

***

"So, Neville…" said Ginny. "Training to be a Warlock of Peace are you?"

"Yes," he blushed.

"Have you bonded anyone?"

"Not yet…" Neville shifted. "Nerve-wracking thought."

"Oh I don't know…" Ginny smiled. "I'm sure it is just like sex, just jump right in to it!"

Neville looked shocked, turned red and giggled.

***

Harry was standing by the gatepost trying to gain back some of his lost dignity. It was quite an impossible task since he had not had any real dignity for the last five years. (It was about then the unofficial Potter-biography by Rita Skeeter was published.) Absentmindedly he stirred his champagne with his wand like it was a cup of tea. Again he tried to find out were Draco had gotten to. He smiled as Fred came up to him.

"_How are you feeling_?" Fred signed Harry.

"_Do you remember when Lockheart spelled away the bones my arm_?" he signed back.

"_Yes?_"

"_Just a bit worse than that_."

"_I see…_"

***

Nymphodora Tonks, pink haired, stepped up to Sirius.

"Is that Fred Weasley talking to Harry?"

"It is," Sirius cradled his third glass of champagne.

"Rather a dish, isn't he?" she bit her lip.

"I always thought so…"

"Why is he waving like that?"

"You know the curse he was hit by during the war?" Sirius emptied his glass. "Deaf and mute, incurable."

"Oh!" Tonks covered her mouth, her hair turning slightly green.

"Silent, but attractive," Sirius emptied his glass with a smile.

Tonks blushed and her hair tuned red.

"You are just as readable as Hermione's new wedding ring."

***

Harry sat down at his seat, beside a very old wizard whose long white beard reached to the ground. Ron had told him that he was Arthur's great-granduncle Theo.

"Hello," he said. "I'm Harry."

"Don't be ridiculous" grunted the old man and squinted. "Harry died forty years ago!"

"Perhaps another Harry…"

"Are you telling me I don't know my own brother?"

"No, no…"

This was going splendidly, he thought. Well, time to do it worse. He took a breath and clicked his glass to get attention. Everybody's eyes turned to him.

"As groomsman I have been asked to say a few words," he began, trying to keep a steady voice. "I have known Ronald and Hermione for many years. They are my best friends and I could not be more pleased that they have finally found each other. It took you some time though…" he paused for the laugh to settle. "I must tell you both that I admire your wonderful bravery. We have been though many things together, but I must say that this step you have made today proves just how brave you are…" again there was laughter. "I know I could not do it," he smiled shyly. "But I'm very happy to se that you can! Please raise your glasses for the adoring couple!"

"The adoring couple!" echoed the assembled people.

Not half bad, thought Harry as he sat down.

"Who are you?" asked the ancient wizard by his side.

***

"Come on," Remus begged Sirius. "Let's dance!"

"No, thank you," Sirius smiled. "I love you, but I want to keep all my limbs intact."

"Spoil sport…" Remus looked around. "Draco, you want to dance?"

Draco, sitting at a table next to a little wobbly Snape smiled hesitantly at the drunken werewolf, but held out his hand. With a haughty look at Sirius Remus dragged the blond up on the dance floor.

Harry watched as Draco was thrown about the floor. For a so soft and gentile man, Remus was dancing like there were no tomorrow, swinging his partner abound. Draco took this in his stride and laughed wholeheartedly. He followed Remus's thrusts surprisingly gracefully.

"I remember the first time I saw Remus dance," said Sirius leaning to Harry. "I feared lives would be lost." He smiled. "You can't take your eyes of Draco I see…"

"Well…" Harry bit his lip. "You can't really go up to someone you haven't seen in five years saying 'tonight is your lucky night, baby', can you?"

"That line worked on Remus when we were fifteen," Sirius shrugged.

"Yeah, but by then you had been best friends for four years."

"It made a little headway, yes," Sirius drained his glass.

***

"You know I love you, Susan," rambled Hermione and turned unsteadily to the guests assembled around her... "I love you! And you!" she looked cross-eyed at Sirius. "I have never met you before, but I love you too!"

"Ignore her," hiccupped Ron to Sirius, "She is drunk…"

"Otherwise you are in trouble," laughed Sirius as Hermione declared her love to a waiter.

"You better catch her before she finds Snape."

Ron looked chocked and ran after his new wife.

***

"How are you then, Seamus?" George sat himself down beside the bride's best man offering him a glass of wine.

"Miserable" Seamus sighed taking the glass.

"What's the matter?"

"I was promised cock!" he sighed again. "Everyone said, 'you be a man of honour and you'll be fighting them off'. Look at this lot! Not a cock in sight!"

"If you're game…" George leaned in. "I can always…"

"Don't be silly George, I'm not _that_ desperate!"

"Good point."

***

"Where are you staying tonight, Harry?" asked Percy holding on to some flower arrangements so he would not fall over.

"Luna and I checked in to the Broom and Griffin," Harry was looking though the bar for something left that was drinkable.

"Why don't you come with us? The Ministry have a house not far from here we can lend."

"Is there room for Luna?"

"Sixty-five rooms, actually."

"Sounds good."

"Right, I'll go tell Luna." Percy pushed himself on to his unsteady feet. "If you don't get lucky first…"

Harry snorted and watched him leave. He found a glass of something and drank it, and spat it out as it tasted horrible.

"Hi."

"Hi!" Harry looked up Draco standing before him. "I thought you gone."

"No, not yet," Draco smiled wickedly. "I was just wondering were you are staying to night."

"Well, I was staying at the pub in the village, but now I have been invited to the Ministry's house by Percy."

"To bad, I'm at the pub," Draco winked. "It was nice… almost meeting you again."

He left, Harry stared.

"Fuck."

***

Seamus and George were snogging theirs heads off in the corner. Both looking quite surprised over this development themselves. Fred rolled his eyes and left to find Percy.

***

"You're driving Perce!" Remus grabbed hold of the Weasley. "You sober?"

"Apscholyley," responded Percy wobbling a bit.

"Stop!" Harry held up his hands. "I think I'm staying at the pub."

"Whooo!" yelled Sirius.

"No, it's research for a book," he climbed out of the car.

"Whooo!" screamed the rest of them and drove off.

Harry looked after them, coming to terms with his decision.

***

Harry apparated to the pub, he landed unsteadily on his feet almost loosing balance. Luckily he had not lost any limbs. Fighting down his nausea, he reminded himself never to drink and apparate again. Standing in the hall he wondered what to do. How was he going to find Draco? There was no one at reception.

"Hello?" he called out.

"Hi!" said Draco looking up from behind an armchair.

"Turned out there was not room for every one…" he blurted.

"In a magical Ministry house?" Draco raised an eyebrow.

"Well you know those Ministry types, always hogging up rooms…"

A house elf popped up be side him.

"Drink, sir?" he squeaked.

"Ah, yes, a whiskey please."

"I'll join you," said Draco. "One for me too."

The elf popped away. Harry turned back but Draco was gone. He looked around, confused. A wizard came in to the room whistling.

"Hiya, Harry!" it was one of Hermione's classmates from Healer education; Harry did not remember his name. "You haven't seen that Malfoy-fellow, have you?

"Who?" Harry still looked around.

"Malfoy, former Death Eater, nice ass?" said the man. "Think I'm half in there…"

Harry suddenly saw that Draco had transformed the armchair to a tiger-fur carpet and was hiding under it on the floor furiously shaking his head at him.

"No, sorry…" Harry moved so he could hide Draco's exit.

"Damn…" the man grunted. "If you see him, tell him I'm in my room?"

"Sure…"

The elf came back with two glasses.

"Here sir, go," he said, "An one for…"

"The night," said Harry taking both glasses clinking then together.

"Give me one of those too," the man eyed Harry in a way Harry did not like. "Maybe we can see the night though…"

"I, eh…" Harry did not know what to say.

"Sir's husband wants sir" squeaked another house elf by his side.

"My husband?" Harry starred down at the elf.

"Room five, if sir was to drunk to remember!"

"Oh… Oh! I see my husband! Him, yes!"

"You are drunk!" laughed the man. "You can't even remember your husband."

"Yeah… Excuse me."

"Keep your eye out for that Malfoy fellow; I think I'm half in there!"

***

Harry knocked on the door of room five. Draco opened.

"He has been after me all day," he rolled his eyes.

"Well, one can see why." Harry cleared his throat and blushed. "Do you want to go somewhere or shall we loiter around here for a bit?"

"Malfoys don't usually loit," smiled Draco. "But I can loit if loiting is required. Do you loit often?"

"I don't see my self as a loiter, no."

"Why don't we loit around in here, and see were it leads us?"

"Fine by me," Harry entered the room.

"I noticed they did not kiss at the ceremony…" Draco leaned on the closed door.

"No, Mionie always was a bit of a prude."

"I think it's because they didn't want to go to far…"

"Hard to know where to stop do you mean?"

"Yes, I mean…" Draco dropped a small kiss on Harry's lips. "…that would be appropriate."

"Or maybe…" Harry responded with a deeper kiss."…like that."

"But definitely not like this…" Draco grabbed hold of his head and crushed their mouths together.

He grabbed hold of Harry's shirt and fell back over the bed.

"Defiantly not in front of the Warlock of Peace," Harry breathed and pulled off his robes.

***

Draco shrank his luggage. Harry stirred in bed, feeling a bit sore he rolled over to his back and looked at him. Draco stood in front of the window with the glowing morning sun behind him lighting up his blond hair. He was dressed in a black fine cut wizard suit.

"You're leaving?" Harry asked putting on his.

"I'm going back to the Manor, sorry I waked you."

"It's all right," Draco rubbed his eyes. "The Manor?"

"I have three month left on my sentence. Just before I go…" Draco looked seriously at him. "When are you going to announce the engagement?"

"Wha… Gosh… I…" Harry collected himself clearing the sleep and the post-shagginess out of his mind, starring at the other man. "You are joking," he laughed. "You damned Slytherin prat! You are joking!"

"Yeah," laughed Draco back, his eyes menacing.

"I thought you had lost it…"

"No…" Draco smiled sadly. "But I think we both lost a good opportunity here… Goodbye."

He left. Harry snuggled in to the sheets smelling the lingering scents of sweat and sex, feeling a bit uneasy.

***

Three months later Harry was woken by his alarm bell. He was just going to kill the bell when he remembered something. He usually did not set the alarm, so something was up. What was it? Harry had it in the back of his head. Slowly rising to a seated position he rubbed his head… Georges and Seamus bonding!

"Oh fuck!"

He rushed out of bed into Luna's room to wake her up.

"Fuck!" she yelled, rolling out of bed.

"Call the Knightsbridge bus!" Harry tumbled into his pants.

"It doesn't go inside London morning traffic," Luna called back, trying to pull on a big bulky silky purple dress over her head. "You know that!"

"Fuck, brooms? Apparation?"

"To a mid-town muggle church?"

"What then?" Harry was panicking. "Shall we run?"

Luna exchanged a suffering look.

"Fuck!"

***

They ran down the street, passing starring Muggles. Harry was holding his dress robes tightly round his waist. Luna was having trouble keeping track of her many layers of skirts, holding on to Harry with one hand. She dropped something big and purple behind her. Harry swore, looking back, trying to remember where he put his wand.

"Leave it!" she yelled. "No one will notice!"

Outside the church Luna halted completely and smiled big at the waiting George as if she been there all the time, heaving her breath. George raised an eyebrow to her.

"I love that colour on you," she puffed, indicating George's black robes. "Is it new?"

Harry wheezed for air and staggered up the stairs. Well inside he cast a wandless breathing spell to get his wind back. Hurriedly he fixed his robes, and found his wand tucked in by the hip under the lining of his underwear.

Smiling, he passed the protective wards put on church to keep uninvited muggles outside. Seamus parents had insisted on a catholic setting for the wedding, even if the bride, George, was neither catholic nor a bride for that matter. Harry found his seat next to Fred. Sirius, who sat on the other side of the man, rolled their eyes.

"Sorry, traffic" Harry looked behind him. "Hi, Gins. Remus."

The two shook their heads.

"Yeah…" he gave a thumbs up to Percy standing by the alter making a fuss over showing him the rings.

***

When the music began Harry was surprised to see a very nervous Neville standing in dark red robes up in front. Three older wizards, with the air of stern teachers stood beside him, looking very stern indeed. Harry remembered now, George and Seamus had agreed to let Neville bind them as a graduation exam. This was going to get interesting. He leaned back.

***

George entered the church on Luna's arm. She was missing a big piece of her long purple dress making her well shaped left thigh completely visible up to the edges of her lacy yellow knickers. Harry cursed a little under his breath for not stopping to summon the thing she had dropped when she was running. Oddly enough, no one seemed to notice, they just wrote it down as natural Luna. Harry tried his best to look oblivious too.

***

When the couple reached the altar and Neville, Luna turned George over to the waiting Seamus. Neville stared chocked at Luna's exposed leg and fiddled with his book, trying to find his place.

"We har, _are_ here today to bind, _bond_ George and Seamus. This is a hole, _holy_, promise between a man and a… _two_ loving, _lovely_ men…"

"You are very lovely too, Neville," said George and got a nudge from Seamus, who tried not to laugh.

Harry almost felt pity for Neville as he stumbled trough the act, getting looks from his examinators. Finally after forgetting George's middle name for the third time, Neville could end the ritual by binding the men's hands together with his wand.

"Bravo!" Remus called out, rose from his seat and began applauding.

"Two days to full moon," whispered Sirius to Harry as they joined in the clapping. "He gets a little emotional sometimes."

***

"You know," said Remus later at reception. "Bonding is the ultimate icebreaker for a stale partnership. Sirius and I are never stale."

"You are such a romantic," said Sirius.

"That is why, my love, we are not bonded," he gave his lover a peck on the cheek. "Percy!"

"How much has he had to drink?" asked Harry as Remus greeted the Weasley.

"Don't worry," said Sirius indicating his own glass. "I'll soon catch up to him."

Not the reassurance that Harry needed, but he choose not to say anything.

"How is our brother's speech coming?" asked Remus.

"Fine," said Percy hesitantly. "Little for everybody… I hope."

"Excellent!" Remus petted his back. "Harry, would you get us some brandy?"

***

Harry stood at the bar, waiting for the drinks.

"Hi," a voice from behind sent shivers down his spine.

"Hello!" he tuned to meet Dracos eyes.

"How are you?"

"Fine!" Harry radiated. "Sorry, I'm overwhelmed to see you…" The brandy arrived, Harry winced. "Oh, don't leave, I must deliver the drinks. Be back in two secs."

"Okay," Draco smiled.

***

Harry hurried back to find Remus and Sirius. They were standing talking to Ginny.

"Here you go," said Harry giving them their drinks. "See you in five hours."

"Something happened?" asked Remus.

"Yes," Harry smiled. "Marvellous wedding," he rushed off with out explaining more.

***

By the bar again he rushed over to Draco who was still waiting for him.

"You look perfect," said Harry. "How are you?"

"I'm well," smiled Draco looking around. "Harry, I'd like to introduce you to my fiancé, Theodore Dexter."

Harry's face fell a bit as he shook hands with a man old enough to be Lucius father.

"Hello…Nice to see you."

"Potter," said the man with all the air of a former Death Eater Supporter.

"It is good to see Draco out again…" Harry trailed off.

"Indeed," the older man shifted his eyes away from him. "Come, dear, I want introduce you to someone." He grabbed Draco and dragged him off.

"I'll see you later," Draco left.

Harry stood still staring after them.

***

"How are you doing, Potter?" Snape eyed Harry sitting in the hallway.

"Not good, sir," he rubbed the base of his nose under his glasses. "I don't know… I mean…

Why have I not found some one to bond with?"

"You are a bit scruffy," sneered Snape looking down his half-empty glass. "Or maybe, you have not met the right one yet."

"Is that really true?" sighed Harry looking up at his former professor. "What if I have already met the right one, maybe they all are right!"

"Well I was not the right one, thank Merlin," Snape shivered and emptied his glass. "But, then again, neither were any of the others…"

"Is there something wrong me?"

"Nonsense," Snape growled and looked utterly bored. "You're a catch, Boy Who Lived Twice. I bet you find your future mate at dinner."

"Yes," Harry smiled and tried to look convinced.

***

Harry panicked as he sat down at his table.

"Hello!" he said.

"Hi!" said a brown haired man, shaking his hand. "I'm Felis, you know Pansy?"

"Yeah! Hi, Pan!" He tuned to the two men at his side and nodded. "Justin. Colin."

The two men nodded. Colin shifted in his seat and cast a glance at his wife next to him; she gave Harry en poisons glare.

"Great…" Harry sat down.

***

At another table Ginny sat next to a Minerva McGonigall.

"So Ginerva," the Headmistress said. "Are you married?"

"No," Ginny looked embarrassed.

"Are you a lesbian?"

"No," laughed Ginny shocked. "What kind of question is that"?

"It is more interesting than 'oh dear, have you not found the right bloke yet?'"

"You're right," Ginny smiled. "Trouble is that I found the right bloke. He just has not found me yet."

"Bad luck…" Minerva petted her hand.

"I was lesbian once," Ginny mused. "At Hogwarts, it only lasted a short while, so I don't think it counts…"

"I know the feeling" nodded Minerva.

***

Harry looked over at Draco sitting laughing with Remus and Sirius. With a sigh he tuned back to his table.

"There are four hundred different kinds of leaches," said Felis in a lecturing tone. "Pansy and I were at the Tidewood swamps just last Christmas."

"How nice…" Harry wondered is he could stab himself with the fork.

"You and Pansy were there once, weren't you?"

"Eh, yes."

"It was vile," commented Pansy. "Harry kept joking every time I was ill."

"I was just trying to cheer you up, Pan."

"Oh, you are _that_ Pansy!" exclaimed the woman from the other side of the table. "When I and Harry were together, he complained about his journey to Tidewood with Puking Pansy. Was that not it?"

"I, I can't remember…" Harry tried to laugh it away.

"Oh, come on Harry," grinned Justin. "I don't think I've been out with anyone less discrete!"

"Don't exaggerate…"

"Not at all!" said his other ex from across the table.

"Was it not that guy, what's his name, Dennis?" said Justin. "His mother made a pass at you?"

"I remember this!" said Pansy with a smile. "He did not know if he should turn her down or not!"

"You called him Dumpy!" laughed Cedric. "His mother was Mrs. Dumpy!"

"I don't think…" Harry winced.

"Both my brother and mother have both lost a lot of weight since then!" said Colin on Harry's other side.

The awkward silence was broken by Percy clinging his glass, holding his wand to his throat.

"Thank Merlin," murmured Harry.

***

Fred and Percy smiled around the room.

"For those who not know I'm Percy Weasley and this is my brother Fred," said Percy nodding for Fred who waved. "My brother speaks with signs, but I'll do my best to translate for those of you who don't understand."

Fred rolled up his sleeves in a very muggle magician sort of manner. Percy cleared his throat, keeping his eyes on Fred.

"When Seamus told me he was bonding with my brother George, I was happy because all of their other boyfriends have been utter tossers!" Percy drew a little paler. "I'm so happy to se many of them here to day! Hello Ha-Harry!"

Harry gave a weak wave. Remus and Sirius let out a loud laugh.

"I also glad to see Lee Jordan, who was the first guy George asked to bond with…" Percy hesitated a little. "As I remember he asked George to… sod off. And lucky for Seamus that he did! Fred!" yelled Percy. "I am not taking part of this any more!" He sat down, red-faced.

Fred shrugged and waved to Lee, who happily waved back and gave George and Seamus double thumbs up. All this happened to the roaring laughter of Remus, Sirius and several others in the room. Harry felt a little embarrassed. George and Seamus kissed.

***

After dinner Harry was slumping in a sofa group with Remus and Sirius. Ginny and Luna came to join them with drinks. Snape slept drunkardly in an armchair nearby, Harry must really talk to him about that.

"Draco is a very charming person," mused Remus eying the dark sleeping man. "I did not expect that. He is engaged to this guy Dexter! Apparently owns half of all magic breweries in Scotland, or something. Loaded, anyway. Ha!" He looked over at Harry. "How are you doing?"

"I'm on the Wedding from Hell…" sighed Harry. "Almost all my exes are here. Next thing I'll run into Dennis, and the horror will be complete."

"Hello, Harry…"

"Hi Den," Harry turned and smiled. "How have you been?"

"Oh, I…" he winced, tears in his eyes.

"Den, I…"

"Why can't you just leave him alone?!" Colin ran up to them. "Have you not done enough?!" He led his crying brother hurriedly away.

"Excuse me," said Harry and left. "I think I'm going to be a hermit…"

***

Tonks, today in yellow hair, walked up to Fred and gave a wave. Fred smiled and did the same.

"_L-i-k-e-d y-o-r s-p-e-e-s-h-e_" she signed.

Fred smiled wider.

"I'm just learning," she mouthed clearly, blushing. "I'm making a lot of mistakes."

"_You're good_"

"_Trunks_"

Fred laughed and asked her to dance.

***

Harry wandered the house, trying to avoid everybody. He thought he had found a good place when he heard voices. Wanting to avoid people he quickly opened the closest door and hid in a bedroom. The next thing he knew, George and Seamus rumbled in. Harry threw a fast hiding-spell, something that only works if no one is looking or searching for you, and if you stand very still. The two men was definitely not looking, they were falling all over the bed tarring at each others clothes.

"Who is a naughty groom!" breathed Seamus as George sucked his neck.

They were so in to what they were doing, that Harry could not disturb. He did not dare casting any more spells or even speak. He sat down in the corner, closing his eyes, holding his ears.

***

Luna sat under a table learning a seven year old girl a hand clapping game.

"Do you have a boyfriend?" asked the girl.

"No," sighed Luna. "Do you?"

"Yes! His name is Bobby and he plays Quidditch." The girl looked at Luna. "Why don't you have a boyfriend?"

"Don't know…" Luna thought. "Most boys think I'm stupid. They just boink me and leave."

"What is boink?" asked the girl.

"Like Quiddich," said Luna. "But with smaller balls."

***

Seamus and George were working on their second joined orgasm. Harry clung to his head, feeling desperate.

"I love my husband!"

"I love my husband!"

"We ought to getting back," gasped George.

"Or we can just wait and go again."

"You naughty little rabbit…"

That did it for Harry. He rose from the floor, the spell falling of him. The two naked lovers on the bad starred at him. Harry smiled, holding up his wand.

"Found it," he said indicating it, and slipped out the door.

***

Well in the hallway again Harry walked straight onto Dennis.

"Harry, we got to talk."

"Right."

"Thing is, I spoken to a lot of people about you… Mostly healers."

"You have?"

"Everybody agrees that you are in trouble."

"Am I?"

"You don't let anybody get close to you. You are affectionate and sweet, even to me, though you think I'm an idiot."

"I don't…"

"I thought there lived a giant Squib in the lake…"

"Well, it can't do magic…"

"Give people a chance! You don't have to think you must get bonded. Just don't start every relationship with I must not get bonded."

"I don't think at all," Harry blushed. "It just sort of happens…"

"Oh, Harry" Dennis embraced him tearfully. "You used to look at me that way. I thought you were going to propose, but you just wanted to end it."

George opened the door, looked at them and closed it again.

"Not at all…"

"This is ridiculous…" cried Dennis tarring himself away.

"Den…"

"No…" tears running down Dennis' face before he apparated.

***

"Having a good night?" asked Draco coming up behind him.

"Yes," sighed Harry. "Right up there with Dumbledore's funeral." Draco winced at this. "I thought you gone…"

"No, Theo took the floo to Edinburgh; he did not want to stay longer than necessary." He smiled. "I'm off now, do you want to join me? For a nightcap?"

"Are you sure?"

"I think we are safe," he smiled. "You are not that adorable. I'm pretty sure I can resist you."

Harry smiled too and joined him.

***

The next morning they woke to a bed in disarray. Harry was lying on his back, Draco gently stroking his chest. Neither of them said a word as Harry rose, got dressed and left.

***

A month later Luna woke him with breakfast in bed. She had made pink scones and served them with strawberry jelly. The tea was hot and had a lilac colour. She had brought the morning mail as well. This was her Saturday ritual, and Harry had learned to enjoy it during the three years they now had been sharing the flat. He sat up in the bed, putting on his glasses. Luna sat on her knees the floor holding her cup of tea.

"What are you up to today?" asked Luna.

"Nothing really," mused Harry stretching. "I just have to meet and help Fred. He wants to look at a muggle toy store, for research."

"I'm thinking of getting a job," Luna declared.

"Really?" Harry looked through the mail.

"There is a shop called Spank, which is looking for an assistant."

"Luns, that is adult sex shop."

"I thought there were a lot of rubber things there," mused Luna.

"Oh, no" Harry opened the first letter.

"What?"

"Another bonding invitation!" sighed Harry. "And a gift list, lovely…"

"Rubber is very practical," Luna continued. "Easy to clean…" She looked at Harry. "You're okay?"

"Yeah," Harry gave a weak reassuring smile to the invitation. "It's Draco..."

***

Harry looked around in the posh shop. He had passed it many times in Diagon Alley, but had never had the courage to walk in. Even if he could afford the things in there, he always felt a bit out of place. The manager, a tall middle age witch looking very unimpressed with his appearance, glared at him. He would not be getting anywhere with his hero-status in here.

"Hi," he smiled hesitantly. "Do you have the list for the Malfoy-Dexter bonding?"

"Certainly," the lady huffed. "Lots of beautiful things, for about a hundred galleons."

"Anything abound five?" Harry half joked.

"You can buy that statue there," she said. "If you can get someone else to add five hundred and fifty galleons."

"Yes…" Harry eyed the statue and then the witch. "Thank you…"

As he began to leave he bumped into Draco at the door.

"Hi" the blond said. "What did you get?"

"Just browsing," Harry played oblivious.

"Nice to see you."

"Nice to see you too."

"I like this present thing," Draco looked around the store. "I should have gotten bonded years ago." He turned to the witch. "Has anyone bought the statue yet?"

"The young man was thinking about it…"

Draco laughed and turned to Harry.

"No, you just get me a tea cosy or something," he smiled. "Are you free, for about an hour?"

"Yeah," Harry looked at his watch. "I was supposed to meet Fred, but I could be a little late."

"Good! I need your advice on something."

***

"Now, Potter, you may not laugh!" came Dracos voice form the changing room.

"All right," Harry sat on a white sofa in facing a small scene surrounded by mirrors. He felt very uncomfortable.

Draco walked out on the stage doing a twirl. He was wearing wide white bellbottom trousers and a ruffled white shirt.

"What do you think?" he asked posing for Harry.

"It is divine," Harry was surprised at his own answer.

"Is it to much like an éclair?"

Harry winced, the ruffles did resemble cream.

"Don't worry," said Draco. "We have just begun."

The next outfit was a surprise. Draco was wearing a glittery white and silver top that was like painted to his body. The pants were puffed and looked like something worn in a harem.

"You are kidding?" said Harry, imagining the look on Lucius Malfoy's face.

"Yes," Draco flexed his arms to himself in the mirror. "It would be fun though? Especially the look on fathers face," he sighed. "Maybe next time?" he laughed.

Next he came out wearing a light beige button-down shirt with wide sleeves and a pair of nature coloured slacks.

"That is nice," said Harry. "Get a flute and you could get a job watching sheep later."

"Don't be crude, Malfoys do not watch sheep." Draco flashed him a smile. "But I can play the flute."

The next made Draco look drop dead gorgeous. The white leather pants like a second skin. A silk shirt did very little to hide is chest. Harry adjusted his seat. Draco gave him a once over.

"Little too sexy?"

"If I were your husband I'd die of pride," joked Harry, and cleared his throat. "But you would ruin the party if your Warlock of Peace got an erection."

Draco laughed and went to change again.

***

Later they were sitting in a Muggle coffee bar.

"You'll ever sleep with anyone else now," said Harry. "Are you going to have affairs?"

"Not when I'm bonded," blinked Draco. "I told Theodore that I'd kill him if he does, so I guess that goes for me too."

"Quite right."

"I've had my share of fun, anyway."

"How many is that, these days?" Harry leaned in.

"I don't know, more than one…" he looked embarrassed.

"Come on," Harry cooed. "I have seen the outfit, we have no secrets."

"Well…" Draco thought. "First one, hard to forget, was kind of nice. Two, hairy back. Three, four five… Six, my birthday in my parents' room…"

"Witch birthday?"

"Fifteen,"

"Really?"

"Grew up in the country, lots of rolling in haystacks. And I am a Slytherin, of course," Draco thought on. "Seven…hmm. Eight, miniature dick. Nine, against a fence, uncomfortable. Ten, oh wonderful heaven!"

"I hate him," commented Harry.

"It was Cedric Diggory," Draco sighed, Harry paled. "Eleven, disappointing after ten. Twelve to seventeen," he winced and gave a little shutter. "Death Eaters, sexually a low blow… Eighteen, Snape, broke my heart, months and months of yearning…"

"I'm sorry, I know the feeling."

"Twenty, ha, I'm at twenty. Twenty one, big tongue…"

"This while you were in house arrest?" asked Harry.

"We have visitors, you know,"

"Fine, go on."

"Twenty two, fell asleep! Git! Twenty tree and twenty four together – that was something…"

"Seriously?"

"Five… six… Twenty seven, big mistake. Twenty eight, his father, twenty nine…"

"Did you run an escort service from that house?" Harry was quite upset.

"You try being looked up alone in your house for five years with only our shagging parents, three house elves and two owls as company!"

"Go on…" muttered Harry.

"Okay, then. Thirty – blah, thirty one. Thirty two, very lovely. And Theodore, thirty three. That's it."

"So I'm after Theodore?"

"You were thirty two." He smiled. "How many have you slept with?"

"Not that many!" Harry shook his head. "What have I been doing with my time? Fought evil, probably, yes, done that a lot…"

"Our hero."

"I wish I sent you an owl," Harry starred at his half empty cup of Frappachino. "But then, you never owled me…" He smiled up at Draco. "You ruthlessly slept with me twice and never owled me." They looked at each other in silence.

"Oh Bollocks!" Harry rose. "Fred! Quick we have to find an apparation point!"

***

They arrived about fifty meters from the toy store. Harry saw Fred standing there, a little lost in his muggle clothes. When he caught sight of Harry he threw his arms up.

"_You are no longer my friend_!" he signed.

"_Sorry_" Harry signed back. "Err, Draco, you know Fred."

"Hi" Draco raised his hand a little awkwardly.

Fred raised his hand too and smiled.

"_We were buying clothes for his bonding_"

"_Who is he bonding with_?"

"_Some rich twat_."

"_Why does the rich twats get all the cute ones_?"

Harry shrugged and looked at Draco, who had not understood anything.

"I was just telling Fred that you are marrying Theodore," said Harry.

"_Have you slept with him?_"

"_Yes_," Harry cleared his throat. "He wished you good luck."

"Thank you," Draco sounded the words.

"_If I was in to guys, he could be shaggable, have to ask George_."

"He wishes he could come," blurted Harry, not really knowing how to translate.

"Well, come!" Draco smiled in honesty. "Harry, bring your whole crew. I want as many Hogwarts people there as possible to weigh out Theodore's dreary business friends and our stiff relatives. Some Gryffindors will just liven up the party."

Harry translated this to Fred, who nodded and gave thumbs up.

"You better go in then," said Draco and patted Harry on the arm. "See you." He gave Fred a nod and walked away.

"Bye" Harry looked after him.

"_Are you coming_?"

"_Just a minute_." Harry ran after Draco before he got to the apparation point.

***

"Draco!"

The blond turned.

"Look, I'm sorry," said Harry. "Really stupid question, in particularly after what you just bought, but I just wondered, obviously not because I've only slept with nine people, but I just wondered, I really feel, that in short, I think I love you, and I was wondering how you, I was wondering if you would… of course not, what was I thinking, I'm an idiot. Excellent, fantastic, fuck. Lovely to see you. Sorry to intrude. I have to go…"

"That was very romantic,"

"Well I thought it over a lot… wanted to get it right… Important to say it, I think."

"What did you say?" smirked Draco.

"That what I said what I thought."

Draco smiled and walked up to him. He gave Harry a peck in the cheek, several Muggles turned their heads.

"You are lovely" said Draco touching his shoulder.

With a last glance, he walked over to the apparation point and disapparated.

***

A month later Harry was tarring though the Scottish highlands on his broom not really knowing were he was. He had taken to long finding his clothes that Remus, Sirius, Percy, Ginny, Luna and Fred had gone before him. He arrived at an enormous castle, with appeared out of nowhere when he crossed the wards. Casting a quick neatness spell on himself he ran to the door that was decorated with white flowers.

"Does any one appose this bond?"

The words flew out as he opened the door and stepped in. He ducked as some people looked his way. _Sorry_, he mouthed and closed the door behind him.

"I now declare these two people bonded before of you all!" said the fat Warlock of Peace in front of Draco and Theodore.

"Fucking hell," said Harry under his breath.

***

Harry joined up with Draco at the party as he greeted his guests.

"You look good," he said. "Not an éclair in sight"

"Thanks," Draco smiled at him and Harry moved on to the party.

He found all of his friends standing in a small hallway talking and looking around themselves.

"Hey" said Remus to Harry. "Look what a big dance floor."

"Someone stop him," Sirius made a mock face of terror. "He'll kill us all!"

"Funny, love, funny," Remus corrected his tie. "Dear young friends," he smiled at the others. "I have under the recent time begun to worry that neither of you have found someone to love. I want to go to a bonding of someone I really like for a change!"

"Don't ask me," said Percy. "I have asked everybody I know."

"You have not asked me," said Luna.

"Well, would you?"

"No, but thanks for asking."

"Any time,"

"Good Percy, good." Remus nodded. "These are my orders for to night. Go forth and find your mates!"

"Excellent," said Percy "What do you think, Gins? Is there a hubby here for you?"

"Bugger off, Percy."

"Right."

"A toast!" Remus conjured out champagne glasses. "In the words of Shakespeare we will be able to say 'I was adored once too!'"

"Who is that?" asked Percy.

"Honestly Weasley," Sirius rolled his eyes. "And you work at the muggle department…"

All laughed and raised their glasses in the toast.

***

"Hello" said Percy to a pretty witch.

"Hello" she said back sipping her drink.

"I have heard many meet their future spouses at bondings."

"Yes, I met my husband at a bonding." She nodded to the fat Warlock.

"Well, there you have it!" said Percy gulping down his whole drink. "Need a refill."

***

Luna walked around the room looking at the dancers. She caught sight of a some what familiar face two feet above to her. Trying to place the man, he turned to look down at her.

"Hi," she said looking up. "I'm Luna. Like the moon, but not as shiny though."

"Hallo" smiled the tall man. "I am Tellus, like earth, but not dirty."

"You're joking," he giggled.

"Yes," He smiled. "I am Viktor, Viktor Krum."

"You are lovely!" said Luna starring into his dark brown eyes.

***

Harry was brooding in the corner when he heard a familiar voice.

"Hello, Harry."

"Dennis, please. I can't handle more drama."

"I was really bad the last time, weren't I?"

"You were," Harry sighed with release. "How are you?"

"Fine," Dennis smiled. "I got a divine new boyfriend," he indicated a handsome man across the room.

"Maybe we should have gotten bonded," sighed Harry.

"No," Dennis shook his head. "Than I had to bond with your friends too. I can't stand Ginny."

"She loves you."

"She calls me Suckface."

"I've never heard that…"

"Oh, owl me for lunch some day," he gave Harry a kiss on both cheeks. "Mmm, still cute."

He left, Harry smiled.

***

"How is Suckface?" asked Ginny coming up behind him.

"Not to mad," he followed Dennis' steps as the man walked over to his boyfriend.

His eyes darted to Draco and Theodore on the other side of the room. They were dancing, well, moving in time with the music anyway, Theodore was not a dancer. Harry sighed.

"You like him, don't you?"

"Yes… Yes, it is a strange thing, and he bonds with someone else."

Harry tarred himself away from the sight and turned to Ginny.

"How bout you Gins?" he asked. "You looked your future partner yet?"

"No need," Ginny sighed. "I have been in love with the same bloke for ages."

"Have you? Who is that?"

"You Harry," she turned to walk in to an empty room, Harry followed. "It has always been you. Since first we met… It does not matter. We can't do anything about it."

"Ginny, I…"

"Friends is not bad, I like friends."

"It is not easy," said Harry taking her hand.

"No," she smiled. "Forget I said it." She looked up. "Sirius!"

Harry looked behind him to his godfather entering the room.

"Were is Remus?" asked Ginny.

"Torturing the business class."

"How kind of him."

***

They stepped out to the dance room, were Remus was throwing an elderly witch over the floor in something that resembled a dance. Dennis and his boyfriend danced by. Fred and Percy was both drunk and swaying, arm in arm. They tried to sign rude comments about the guests. Remus realised himself from the dance, looking quite flustered. He came over to Harry and Ginny.

"Any rings on fingers?" he asked smiling with a breath and red face.

"You don't know how lucky you are," Ginny gave him a hug. "Finding the right one is hell."

"This is hell!" Remus laughed. "Sirius is trapped by some Hybristophobic from Wales."

"What is that?" asked Harry looking over the room to the man clinging to Sirius.

"Some one who gets turned on by violent criminals," Remus smiled. "I'll save him in a bit."

***

"Ladies and Gentlemen! Witches and Wizards!" a voice rang out in the room. "The grooms!"

All guests hurried to scramble for the speeches. Harry held back, trying to keep a low profile. He saw Lucius and Narcissa at the front. Probably they got a leave from their house arrest to go to Draco's bonding. Narcissa was extremely pregnant, Harry noticed and Lucius was holding a blond toddler girl on his arm. He thought about what Draco had said about shagging parents, and guessed that the Malfoys had their own way of coping with cabin fever. Harry found this somewhat endearing, in a strange way. Draco climbed a set of stairs to come higher up. He put his want to his throat.

"Thank you all for coming," he said. "Even you who knew that we were going to be here."

"I like that boy" said Remus, still out of breath, to Harry. "Really shaped up."

"I would like to thank my parents for being here today, and for bringing my lovely new siblings. I love to see your family grow, and today it has got even bigger. I love you Theodore" he kissed the older man. "Thank you,"

Draco then reached out and shook his fathers hand, Lucius took it with a smile. Applauses filled the room. Harry sighed.

"Oh, one more thing!" Draco smiled jokingly. "Someone told me that he was ready to fill in if this did not work. I'll just say; Thanks, I'll keep you posted."

Everyone laughed at this; Harry turned away and walked back to the empty room. But it was not empty. Remus was lying on the floor, convulsing. Harry ran forward and kneeled beside him. Fred and Percy were not long after.

***

"Remus?" Harry asked. "Find a healer!"

Percy ran off. George began to undo Remus necktie. Harry hovered with his wand, not really knowing what to do. He helped George unbutton the jacket. Percy returned with Snape who pushed Harry roughly aside.

"What is wrong?" he asked.

"He collapsed." Harry answered almost too calmly.

Snape worked his wand over Remus body. Ginny came in, took one look and clung on to Percy. Luna ran in to sit next to Harry; her blue eyes seemed to be awake for the first time ever. Snape shook his head; his face was paler than ever.

"His heart has given up," he said, voice low. "It's common among werewolves, the transfigurations are straining. There is nothing I can do."

With shaking arms Harry turned Luna over to George. His eyes filled with tears he got to his feet. He got to find Sirius, he thought. Shell-shocked he walked to the dance room again. The speeches went on. Harry did not listen. He found Sirius by other side of the stairs. Trembling he explained what had happened. Sirius face drained from all life.

***

The funeral was kept in an open field. The day was rainy but a charm stopped the rain from falling on the guests. A simple urn with Remus ashes stood on a small stone altar. There were several people gathered there. Many were students from Remus short time at Hogwarts, but there were also people from the Ministry and some others that Harry did not know. Even Bill and Fleur had come from France to attend. Sirius stood in front, by the urn, looking pale and stern.

Harry sat down beside Ginny and nodded to Fred who came with a black-haired Tonks on his arm. He noticed Draco standing to the side with some other old Slytherin students. They locked eyes, and then Harry looked away. He folded his arm around Ginny, who had begun to cry. Neville stepped to the front in his blue robes.

"Good morning, on this sad day. We will start the ceremony shortly, but first, Sirius Black, Remus closest friend would like to say a few words."

Neville stood aside and Sirius stepped forward.

"Remus liked funerals," he said. "Cause it was more likely that he be involved in one, than him dragging me to get bonded… We did not need bonds though, we were bonded by hearts. He was a calm man but full of life, especially when drunk. He had a big heart but it was a weak heart. I hope your memory of him will not be the werewolf but the man… What I felt, what I feel. Words fail me, so I chosen to borrow some words from another wonderful bastard, namely me:

_My wolf, you were my dream_

_From where you came the winds are cold_

_Secrets whispered though keyholes_

_Our strange longings were never asleep_

_Now you are were no heart beats_

_Do not cry, my wolf, don't worry_

_What we have started we must now stop_

_You have to give in, but I'll never give you up_

_I will tell desperate jokes_

_To a world that has put love on hold._

_Do not cry, my wolf, don't worry_

_I miss your sunken eyes_

_And even the pain in your cries_

_You will always be the shape in the dark_

_Do not cry, my wolf_

_Don't you worry now*_

***

"Good of you to come," said Harry. "Must have been a short Honeymoon."

"We'll do it some other time," said Draco and hesitated. "You know the thing you said in the street… "

"I'm sorry about that."

"No, I liked it. I liked hearing you saying it.

He gave Harry a fast kiss on the cheek as good bye and left. Ginny came up to Harry.

"I'll take Luna home," she said.

"Okay," Harry sighed and hugged them both.

"Fancy a walk there, Harry ?" asked Percy.

"Yeah, that would be grand."

***

"Never felt like that," said Percy as they walked. "Maybe for Gwyn, when I was young…"

"Gwyn?"

"Cat."

"It is odd, is it not?" said Harry. "All this time we have been single and not really noticed that two of us we not."

"Traitors," smiled Percy looking off. "I wonder if losing a lover is like loosing a child. You know, when thought we lost Fred, mom and dad went really sick. I hope I die before my kids."

"How do you do that?" asked Harry.

"What?"

"How do you stay so sure that you will have a family? What if you never meet the right one? Why bother if we can't be like Sirius and Remus?"

"Well," Percy thought. "Unlike you, I don't expect a lightning strike, I just want to find some one nice who likes the looks of me, and try to be happy"

"Maybe you are right…" Harry sighed and looked back the way Draco had gone. "It gets you nowhere waiting for the one true love."

***

Five months later Harry awoke by several alarms going of at the same time. He sat up totally confused and dizzy.

"Waz fuck goin on?!" he gasped.

"Wakey wakey!" Percy jumped up from the other side of bed and turned off the ten different morning alarm spells. "Great bonding hair style!"

Harry starred at him feeling ruffled.

***

Sirius was already in the kitchen smiling at Harry as he emerged in t-shirt and boxers.

"Sirius," smiled Harry, "Best looking best grooms man in the world! Thank you for doing this today."

"No problem," said Sirius.

"I wish Remus was here," said Harry giving him a hug.

"I think he does too" smiled Sirius back. "I'm sorry we are so late, by the way. That muggle car is fun, but hell to learn to drive."

"Late?" asked Harry.

"It's almost nine. Everybody is waiting for you."

"Bollocks!" Harry threw his hands up. "Damn Percy! I told him to wake me at eight!"

He ran off to find his suit. Sirius greeted Luna as she entered the kitchen.

"Morning, ready to do this?"

"Oh absolutely!" she mused adjusting a pair of pink sunglasses.

***

Sirius pushed down the breaks to the car in front of the tent site. They all flew forward. Ginny was almost hitting the dash board. Percy gave Sirius a glare, which was responded with a smirk.

"Time?" asked Harry trying to tie his bowtie.

"Really?" asked Sirius.

"Bloody yes!"

"About half passed eight."

"Ah!" Harry gasped and began to run, and then he stopped and turned. "You bastards!"

Luna took a photo. All laughed but Harry.

With a gesture of his wand, Fred set up a picnic breakfast on the grass.

***

"I like to say a few words" said Ginny as they all sat down. "As many of you know I have been a keen study of Harry's love life for many years. And I presently feared that he was bonded to all of us. But it has all worked out, even if the partner to be is mad, but that is maybe why Harry loves him. Let me give a toast to Harry and his pretty boy on this sad day – To Harry and Suckface!"

"Harry and Suckface!" repeated all.

***

In a tent not so far off sat Dennis, being waited upon by his groom mates. A winning smile adored his face. Colin adjusted his brothers tie but was slapped away. Dennis smiled smugly in the mirror.

***

"I want to thank you all for those lovely word about my future spouse," said Harry. "I have a letter here from him that he has asked me to reed." He unrolled a small piece of parchment. "'If any of you try to come near our house, I'll set the dogs on you!'"

"Dogs on you," laughed Percy.

***

Harry stepped in to the great tent, looking at all the decorations. The press was already scurrying about finding good photo angles. Some of the cameras flashed at Harry as he greeted Ginny coming in after him. She was wearing a very colourful dress. She handed him a program.

"You do look lovely today" said Harry.

"Well, I'm not wearing black anymore."

"I see that."

"From now on I will be colourful and fall in love with someone who loves me back."

"Darling Gins," Harry kissed her cheek.

She kissed his cheek back and whipped some smeared lipstick of.

"That won't do," she laughed.

***

More and more guests were arriving. Hermione was carrying a little redheaded baby girl in her arms. Ron was holding an identical baby in his.

***

"Good luck" said Neville to Harry passing him by in his blue robes

Harry smiled nervously back.

***

Luna was showing in guests. She suddenly screamed, scaring the life out of Sirius and Percy who stood beside her. She ran to the crowd jumping in the arms of Viktor Krum, wrapping her legs about him.

"I thought you gone on tour with your team!"

"Not wit out you," he laughed holding her to him.

He lifted her up to kiss her.

***

Harry was really nervous now. He did not want to be wished good luck anymore; still they came with their handshakes and smiles.

***

"Harry or Dennis?" Sirius asked an agent wizard.

The wizard stared at him; his long white beard almost touched his feet.

"It should be obvious that I'm neither!" scrolled the old man and walked on.

***

"Harry or Dennis?" Percy asked a young woman.

"Dennis" said she turning to him.

Percy stared, trying to figure out how to speak.

"Yes…" he tried. "Fine. Have, have we met before?"

"We have," smiled the beautiful woman. "About fifteen years ago. I'm Diearde, your father's second cousin Flossies daughter. You are Percy."

"Merlin," hicuped Percy taking her offered hand. "So you are family then?"

"Very distant," she smiled.

"Off course," he tried to collect himself. "Let, let me show you to your seat."

He did not let go of her hand until she was seated.

***

Harry shook hands with George.

"How are you?" he asked.

"Absolutely knackered, actually," said George nodding at Seamus talking to Sirius.

Harry laughed and turned around. Draco had just walked in to the tent. He was not wearing any formal wear at all. Just an ordinary weekday robe, that still looked gorgeous on him.

"Hi" Draco said

"Hi" smiled Harry.

"You look good," said Draco. "But then you always do."

"How is Theodore?"

"Fine, I think," Draco looked embarrassed. "He was not the man for me after all…"

"You left him?"

"We left each other" Draco shrugged.

"When?"

"A couple of weeks ago, it was hell. Teach me to marry a man almost trice my age."

"Harry?" Sirius came closer. "It is time."

"Yeah" Harry starred at Draco. "Why did you not get in touch?"

"I thought about it, I wanted to, but I was so down… and I thought… you were you and I… Anyway, I'm keeping you. I'll se you afterwards."

"Excellent…" Harry was chocked as Draco started to leave. "Wait, let, let me take you to your seat."

He led Draco though the tent, trying to ignore the guests around him. One photographer took a picture of them. Harry blinked at the flash. Disoriented he pulled Draco to the side of the great tent.

"Bad timing," half smiled the blond.

"Really bad."

"Disastrous"

"Very bad indeed." Harry smiled. "It is lovely to see you."

"Good luck" said Draco. "It is very easy. Just say answer 'I do' to all questions."

"Yes, thank you."

Draco left for his seat.

***

Walking to the front with Sirius, Harry stopped.

"Um, can you give me a minute?"

"Eh, yes," Sirius answered. "Go freshen up."

Harry left for the tent's vacant backside, glancing at Draco as he went. He stood still for a few seconds.

"Oh Merlin, forgive me…" he began to pace, kicking the ground. "But, bugger! Bugger! Bugger! Bugger, bugger, bugger!"

"Potter?" Snape's head shot out of the tent. "Is that you?"

"Yeah, just warming up the voice, big crowd."

"Are you sure that is the right word you want to use?"

***

Outside Dennis arrived with his following.

"He is here," said Sirius to Percy.

"We seem to have lost the other groom," said Percy.

"Stall him," whispered Sirius as Dennis came closer. "I'll see if I can find him."

"Right"

***

"I'm so sorry…" Percy sprinted to Dennis, "…there is a delay."

"Delay? What?!"

"Er… the flowers, many allergies, must move around a little."

***

Sirius found Harry sitting on the ground behind the tent. Snape was standing near by. The older men exchanged a look. Snape shrugged.

"Harry?"

"Hmm?"

"Good to see you."

"Yeah…" he poked the dirt under his shoes with his wand. "Sirius? What do you think about marriage?"

"Eh… It is good? That is, if you really love the person."

"Quite…" Harry took a breath. "Then why was not you and…?"

"Remus and I…" Sirius sighed. "We did not need to prove anything. We knew."

"All these weddings, all these years," Harry sighed. "Here I am on my own wedding and still thinking…um…"

"What are you thinking of?" interrupted Snape, sounding irritated.

"I really don't want to say…"

"Harry time is going…" Sirius nudged him.

Harry felt someone nudge him, he looked up at Fred.

"_What is going on?_" the redhead signed.

"_Draco is divorced, he is sitting in there_."

"_It is your wedding day_."

***

A slight murmur had begun to spread among the guests. The reporters where having a field day. Percy came in.

"I've managed to stall them," he said to Luna. "The advantage of people thinking you are stupid is that they often believe you when you lie."

"I have noticed that too," she nodded with a knowing smile. "The same goes for crazy."

***

"_What am I going to do_?"

"_You got three choises. One: Go on with it. Two: say 'it is off, go home'_."

"_The third_?"

"_Can not think of a third_." Fred shrugged.

"Harry?" Neville stuck out his head again. "Ready to face the enemy?"

"Are you?" asked Sirius with a worried glance at Snape.

"Yes," sighed Harry. "Excellent…"

***

The music started and Dennis was led in by his groomsman. Harry stood and starred at the tent wall behind Neville.

"We are here today," said Neville. "To bond these to people together. If there is anyone apposing this, say so now… Bonding is…"

He went quiet, looking over Harry's shoulder. Everybody in the tent turned to look at Fred holding his hand up. Some cameras flashed.

"Do you want to say something, Fred?" asked Neville.

"_What_?" signed Harry.

"_I thought of the third one_."

"_What_?"

"_Translate for me_?"

"What is going on?!" growled Dennis.

"He wants me to translate."

"_I think you have doubts_."

"He says, I'm… having doubts."

"_I think you are in love with someone else_."

"He thinks that I am I love with someone else."

"Do you love someone else?" asked Neville.

"Harry?" asked Dennis.

"I do," said Harry.

Next thing he knew was Dennis' fist in his face.

***

As he came to he was sitting in the kitchen of Grimmuald Place. Snape was holding a cloth drenched in some potion against Harry's black eye.

"Blamey" said Luna holding hands with a bemused Viktor Krum at the kitchen table.

"At least it is a wedding we won't forget," said Snape.

"It is not a weeding if you don't have a ceremony," Sirius smirked.

"Poor Dennis" said Ginny. "I do not like him, but that was not nice."

"God, poor Dennis…" Harry rubbed his cheek, feeling a big bruise forming. "What have I done?"

"Let's face facts," Percy pointed out. "If you did not want to marry him on your wedding day, then it must have been the right thing to do."

"Yes," Ginny sighed.

"It was a lovely robe he was wearing," said Luna. "He can use it on parties!"

"_It is my fault_," signed Fred.

"What did he say?" asked Snape.

"He blames himself," said Harry.

"No don't do that," said Sirius patting Fred's back.

"_He blames you too,_" signed Harry.

Fred shrugged.

There was a knock on the door.

"Probably reporters," said Ginny. "I'll take it."

"No," Harry rose. "It is me that they are after…"

He left the kitchen.

***

Outside the door in the pouring rain stood Draco.

"Hi," he said.

"Hi," Harry replied. "You are soaking, come inside."

"No, it is fine. I can't get any wetter than this."

"Then I'll come out."

Harry stepped out in the downfall, not thinking that he only wore a shirt.

"I just wanted to check if you were okay…" Draco licked the rain of his lips. "Not that I think that you would kill yourself or something, but… but you're fine, so… I should not have come today. I'm sorry."

He turned and left.

"No, wait!" Harry ran after him. "It was my fault. I'm the bastard here! I just realised that me and marriage, that is not meant to be! And I realised that I, for the first time in my life, did love someone, and it was not the man standing beside me. It is the man that is standing her in the rain with me."

"Is it raining?" Draco stared. "I have not noticed."

"I have always loved you, I think… You are not going away again?"

"No," Draco smiled. "I might drown, but no."

"We'll go in. But I have to ask you. After we dried off and spent some more time together… Do you think that you could not marry me, and doing this for the rest of your life?"

"I do!"

Their lips met as the thunder struck above them

***

Photos:

Dennis + Lee Jordan

Fred + Tonks

Luna + Viktor

Percy + Dierdre + kitten

Sirius + Snape

Ginny + Prince William

Harry + Draco + puppy

***

The End

* The poem is a rewrite of the song _Cry Wolf_ by A-ha


End file.
